Thursday, July 17, 2008
Teacher: Ah Kau, if your father has $10 and you ask him for $6, how
much would your father still have?
Ah Kau: $10.
Teacher: You don't know Maths.
Ah Kau: You don't know my father la!
Mother: David, come here.
David: Yes, mum.
Mother: You really disappoint me. Your results are getting worse.
David: But but but....I will only get my report card tomorrow ???
Mother: I know that, but I'm going Hong Kong tomorrow so I'm scolding you
Father: Why did you fail your Mathematics Test?
Son: On Monday, teacher said 3 + 5 = 8
Son: On Tuesday, she said 4 + 4 = 8.
On Wednesday, she said 6 + 2 = 8.
If she can't make up her mind, how I know the right answer one ???
Girl: Do you love me?
Boy: Yes Dear.
Girl: Would you die for me?
Boy: No la, mine is undying love only !!!
Man: How old is your father?
Boy: Same as me la.
Man: How can that be?
Boy: He only became a father when I born lo !!!
Teacher: Simon, your composition on 'My Dog' is exactly the same as
your brother's. Did you copy his?
Simon: No la, teacher. It's the same dog!
Father: Your teacher says she finds it impossible to teach you anything!
Son: That's why I tell you she's no good!
Teacher: Where were you born?
Student: Singapore , Sir.
Teacher: Which part?
Student: All of me ma....
A boy came home from school with his exam results.
' What did you get?' asked his father.
' My marks are under water,' said the boy.
' What do you mean 'under water'?'
' They are all below 'C' (sea) level.'
Monday, July 7, 2008
for some reasons,i hate hospitals. i think they scare me,cos am not sure y i hate them, or maybe its the feeling of having to take panadols cos the sight of one irritates me... well lately i had no option but to even spend nites the...i was briefly cut open for a while n it sucks cos i get to sleep facing the ceiling with no choice cos of pains from the cut...goodnews is ,i can now face a new direction(just one tho.)..but then its still beta than the cieling..
B4 dis, i really had dreams of going the annual music festival n get drunk on 'tuak', but i guess dat aint gonna happen for me..:(..so i used the intended rwmf 'budjet' and invested in sumthing else...wanna try guessing?Yup! i craved it so bad after i first saw it..now i got it. next thing i wish to get is a horse...yup a horse...
Wednesday, June 18, 2008
i came across this pic today n i couldnt help but post it. its so funny n i wanna knw wat ya all think too..
gross or funny?! wats ur opinion?
Monday, June 9, 2008
Tuesday, May 20, 2008
WHEN GIVING A CUSTOMER BAD NEWS
Britons: I'm sorry, Sir, but we don't seem to have the sweater you want in your size, but if you give me a moment, I can call the other outlets for you.
Malaysians: No Stock.
RETURNING A CALL
Britons: Hello, this is John Smith. Did anyone page for me a few moments ago?
Malaysians: Hello, who page?
ASKING SOMEONE TO MAKE WAY .
Britons: Excuse me, I'd like to get by. Would you please make way?
Malaysians: S-kew me
WHEN SOMEONE OFFERS TO PAY
Britons: Hey, put your wallet away, this drink is on me.
WHEN ASKING FOR PERMISSION
Britons: Excuse me, but do you think it would be possible for me to enter through this door?
Malaysians: (pointing the door) can ar?
Britons: Please make yourself right at home.
Malaysians: Don't be shy, lah!
WHEN DOUBTING SOMEONE
Britons: I don't recall you giving me the money.
Malaysians: Where got?
WHEN DECLINING AN OFFER
Britons: I'd prefer not to do that, if you don't mind.
Malaysians: Don't want la...
IN DISAGREEING ON A TOPIC OF DISCUSSION
Britons: Err. Tom, I have to stop you there. I understand where you're coming from, but I really have to disagree with what you said about the issue.
Malaysians: You mad, ah?
WHEN ASKING SOMEONE TO LOWER THEIR VOICE.
Britons: Excuse me, but could you please lower your voice, I'm trying to concentrate over here.
Malaysians: Shut up lah!
WHEN ASKING SOMEONE IF HE/SHE KNOWS YOU.
Britons: Excuse me, but I noticed you staring at me for some time.. Do I know you?
Malaysians: See what, see what?
WHEN ASSESSING A TIGHT SITUATION.
Britons: We seem to be in a bit of a predicament at the moment.
WHEN TRYING TO FIND OUT WHAT HAD HAPPENED
Britons: Will someone tell me what has just happened?
Malaysians: Wat happen Why like that....
WHEN SOME ONE DID SOMETHING WRONG
Britons: This isn't the way to do it here let me show you,
Malaysians: like that also don't know how to do!!!!
WHEN ONE IS ANGRY
Britons: Would you mind not disturbing me
Sunday, May 11, 2008
Friday, May 2, 2008
Rite now i feel like the worst son ever! i don't even know my parents birthday! well i guess dats because am not their parents(does dat make sense?)...
Today i was at VA n i got a call from my mum n she sed "u r bad! not even a happy bday sms!" n i was like, "i thot it was on the 23rd of march?" n she sed it was on the 2nd.. to make it worse, i asked "mummy, how old are you now?"...wtf! i don't even knw my mums age!
HAPPY BIRTHDAY MUM!! I LOVE U! i could have asked u to marry me but that guy called my dad was faster.:(...
Wednesday, April 30, 2008
i have no idea to wat other people think, but i think "iron man" was a 'kick ass' movie...i would give it a 8 outa 10...i loved the ride used...audi's are so sick looking n the latest one "Audi R8" which was used in the movie is d best audi 4 me so far...
Tuesday, April 22, 2008
Thursday, April 3, 2008
Comedy Central's parent company Viacom reportedly offered Chappelle a $55 million contract (giving Chappelle a share of DVD sales) to continue production of Chappelle's Show for two more years while allowing him to do side projects. Chappelle had stated that sketches are not his favorite form of comedy, and that the characteristics of the show's format were somewhat like short films.and after this, he just walked away! how many guys walks away from 55million usd!?!?! its no wonder oprah had to ask him herself. but then if u look at his own point of view, he sed taking the deal would be like prostitution to him..he d hoe, n viacom the pimps. like he was gonna do wateva he wanted. after dave turned down the deal, n went missing, nobody thot he would be in...well guess 4 a try...
if dis isnt enough y not see this...a skit on y he quit "chappelles show"
he also did a skit on matrix..
Sunday, March 30, 2008
The party was at the poolside of village grove condominiums and the required dressing code was meant to be all white, tho some ppl had a mixture of colors..as 4 me,i did just as dey sed n turned up all white...
victor pimping!(pharoah is in the building) tosin(aka soulja girl)
9ners (mobo n yusuf)its just a pose ppl (with joy)
tosin giving me the looks *cough* feeling like soulja boy here (yah yah trick!)
me n victor with the celebrants
me n jennifer.(i wasnt ready wen dis pic was taken.;))
victor rocking one of the celebrants to a dancehall tune.
he got too tipsy n decided to take a swim...with his clothes shoes n wallet on.
these are d few pics i had on my cam..other pics which includes dancing in the pool n other stuffs were in sombody else's cam...
i finally quit drinking beer. yay! i drink hieniken now. for those thinking its still beer, u r wrong cos i watched a commercial on you-tube where they sed "more than just a beer". fair enof 4 me. thx ppl. cheers.
Tuesday, March 25, 2008
Saturday, March 22, 2008
i know humans do have threesomes or groupie sex, but the fact that dogs do thesame, is just amazing!
i was driving to school dis morning at bout 8 wen i spotted three dogs at the middle of the road in stampin.
ok i could see dat the dog untop was humping the female cos of its waist movments, but wat i didnt understand was y the other dog was also the until i drove closer n behold, its trottle proppeler was in too but in a reverse order making it 2 trottle proppeler's in one chamber of commerce !
i actually wasted 10 mins of my class time n car fuel figuring it out..the best part is, cos they were at the middle of the road, i wasnt the only driver amazed! i had like 4 other ppl watching with me.
Thursday, March 20, 2008
for some reason i love the song "low" by flo rida, it just reverses my mood from bad to good all the time i hear it while in a bad mood...
i feel funny rite now cos dis post or blogging in general makes me feel new to the whole thing,i guess i will get used to it againg soon after more posts..
What is it with malaysian drivers? y r they labelled the worst drivers in the world?(not by me)...the other day, i was driving down from padugan area and a SLEEPING old lady was gonna hit me n instead i ended up in the curb n the lady ended up causing another crash! who sleeps while driving!!???!!! the funny thing is she neva stopped. well i gave chase(which was fun cos i felt like 007), only to find out it was just an old lady! damm i was gonna show my middle finger to her! well maybe sum other time..
Friday, February 22, 2008
Thursday, February 21, 2008
Wednesday, January 2, 2008
1. Make money! lots of it!
2. go places! lots of places!
3. become a guru in class (yea rite)
4. Minimise partying as much as i can!
5. be at peace with every1
6. get a girl (like wtf!)
7. Make my sis cook 4 me every weekend (since she has decieded to come over :( )
8. Eat sushi(thx kim!)
AND BEST OF ALL
9. Graduate to the rank of "JEDI PIMP PLAYA" of 2008! yea like WTF, am gonna be a p.i.m.p, n thats the chizzle up in dis bizzle (wtf does dat mean?)
HAPPY NEW YEAR PEOPLE!!!! thanks 4 does dat supported me last year (2007), I LOVE U ALL!